I THINK THIS IS MY LAST POST....

its true my friends....i mean, i might be back later b/c i love being able to share whats going on in my life and what the Lord is doing in my life....but it can become all consuming..you know where you check every couple of hours, totally wasting precious time when you havent even had your quiet time..no? just me? ok well, this has happened before for me...and i was telling my friend the other day that i think its sad that people even think about judging their worth with how many away messages they got or xanga comments or missed calls and well, i dont like something having so much power....and so i am going on hiatus....so for a while, im signing off....i love you all and hope that the Lord keeps doing great things in each and every one of your lifes....holla!

WHY AM I AWAKE?

i mean, nothing significant is really on my mind that i need to talk about...well, actually, i guess my heart is a little heavy....do you ever see updates of people from your childhood, say on facebook or xanga or myspace? i mean, people you once had such a connection to that are now not even a part of your life...i remember that I discovered a very imporatant lesson in middle school...i experienced 2 or 3 of my very closest friends moving away and i just didnt understand how God could bring me into such an amazing friendships only to have them taken away... but then I realized that each of the people in my life had been extremely immportant and influencial and much needed AT THAT PARTICULAR TIME....I realized had some of them not moved away, there would have been no way I would have gotten so close to the next person...I guess life is weird like that, or should I say God is weird like that, but weird in a wonderful way....i guess it just makes me sad but a little resentful at the same time...it makes me somewhat angry that i dont have relationships with these people....and even more angry when i try to at least hold an acquaintance with them and they could care less....i hate that who they see when they see me is the same girl on the outside but much different on the inside...i remember sixth grade....i was mean and perverted....and boy crazy....thankfully the Lord got a hold of my heart but sometimes i still think back on those days....i have a confession to make....i lusted over a movie star...well, not so much a movie star, but a tv star...not lust like, well, you know....but wow, hes incredibly beautiful, holy cow, hes amazingly beautiful and afterwards i didnt like that someones outward appearance could cause so much attraction....and hold so much power...a sobering thought that got my heart and mind back on track....maybe i shouldnt share so much....hmmm....<><

Currently Listening Singing in the Rain By Roger Kellaway see related

6 GLORIOUS WEEKS...

thats all i have left until summer...can you believe it? i cant...i mean, people. april is only 9 days away....my time at home for spring break truly was a blessing...even though brooke and danyelle werent there, i was still able to have an amazing time and spend much needed time with the parentals....guess what i did...I DROPPED MY FRENCH CLASS!...very spur of the moment of me isnt it....well, heres the thing...i made a D on my 2nd test, just like i did my last one, and studied my butt off...i just dont understand why im not understanding a language i once loved....it doesnt help though that i hated the class b/c i didnt learn anything...but thats besides the point...so i only have 1 class on mwf and its not until 2:00 which is weird but i like it.....i have a start taking advantage of that hour i now have free....i like being back at school...i love the fellowship of my friends that i have here...i even love my classes...all 3 that i have....but in the same breath, i just cant wait until summer....anna and i have made plans to go to lsmsa's graduation which im just SO excited about but bummed at the same time that my nsu friends probably wont be there...and then like 2 weeks later is Sheralyns wedding which im just overjoyed about....i love weddings...especially when its the joining of 2 Godly people who you know are gonna spend their lives serving Him together...how exciting....and THEN im going to jolly ole Texas...doesnt seem like a year has gone by since i was there last summer....man, i cant wait to see all my friends there and spend time with them...what fun! and then my fabolous friend whitney is gonna come stay with me for a week or so and THEN i will be going to the beach...dont know when or where but i do know that it will involve sandy beaches and waves crashing into the shore...prob. sometime in July...oh what the summer holds...but until then, im content to be a student, working hard, enjoying life, loving God...ahhh, sweet peace.....<><

*Im actually listening to my roommate sing this song.....lol*

Currently Listening Simply Nothing By Shawn McDonald see related

THANK YOU....

some people just enrich other peoples lives...there are so many on my heart that i want to give a little shout out, if you will....a blessing of thanks...

to Melissa  Davis: what would my life be without you in it? probably very uneventful..lol... you bless me with your laugh and your voice...never cease bringing glory to the one who gave you such powerful pipes, girlfriend! Please dont forget how gifted you are....

to Jake Leger: yes, Leger, not Leeger...I dont know how to put the accent though...you bless my heart in so many ways...you make me laugh so hard and you are radiant with a heart for the Lord....I see you truly growing into a man after God's own heart...

to Cory Taylor: youre strength in the Lord inspires me...Im so thankful for your friendship and all that it means to me....youve taught me many things...like how to truly be a friend... I wish you didnt live soo soo far away...

to Cory Terrell: your love for the Lord makes me feel overjoyed..how you praise Him amongst the trials and tribulations....you make me feel beautiful even when i dont feel that way....you inspire me to push forward and seek the One who gives me life

to Anna Harvan: youre such a joy to be around...one thing is for sure....I cant thank of two girls who love pink more than you and i....i cant wait til our adventures in Europe come to be ONE DAY....ONE DAY....lol....

to Whitney West: oh how the Lord knew what he was doing when he brought us together as small group leaders...you bless my heart so much...i adore you and am so blessed by your friendship...youre so so bubbly, which I appreciate most of the time...lol....

to Brooke Wells: my sheltering tree...enough said....youre the best friend Ive ever had....

to Jessica Meyers: youre such a prayer warrior...you open up your mouth to lift praises to the King and I get chill bumps...youve really been there for me at some times when i needed prayer most...thank you....

to my small group girls: God has taught me so much through yall...the wisdom possessed by each of you overwhelms me...im going to miss yall sooo much next year....

to Danyelle: my big sister....my role model...thank you for your advice....your love when im not lovable...your friendship....your strength when i have none....

to Jordan Ricks: you had such an impact on my life my junior year...thank you for showing me such Godly love and sharing your name with me

to Sheralyn: you are my mentor....you mean so much to me....youve taught me important live lessons like how its important not to lie because conviction will eat you alive and how to act like an adult and own up to my faults...and how to be gracious....

to Cory Magee: my big brother...youve been there for me for almost 5 years now and I forsee you being there filling the role as big brother for years to come....

May you all continue to lead lives that impact others, as yall have in mine...i love you all with a love so big, xanga cant hold it...may the Lord bless you and keep you, may his face shine upon you....<><

Currently Listening Ripen By Shawn Mcdonald see related

DISCOVERIES...

         Had a lot of them today...my mom and i drove to the coast to look at the Katrina damage and hopefully find some inspiring subjects for my photo assignment....well,we hadnt even gotten on the highway towards Pearl River when I found my first subject....it was a young guy waiting on the side of the road for traffic to pass so he could cross...he had crutches and one leg....my heart broke...and we drove right by....next subject I found was this precious old man in Cracker Barrel who sat one table over....after my mom and i blessed our dinner he came over and told me that seeing us pray touched his heart...i wanted to cry...the whole time i ate all i could think was that he'd be perfect...but we got up and left....i know one day i will see his precious face again though...he reminded me of my pawpaw Hershel....then i found my next subject...and this time i wasnt going to let this opportunity pass by...as my mom drove into the Sams parking lot, there was this man with long hair, kindof homely looking trying to light a cigerette...i was ready to get out but really had to group, ya know....i mean, i was a nervous wreck, not quite sure how these people would respond to some random girl asking for their photo...this time, he got up and left before i had grouped myself....lastly on our way down the coast we saw 2 young people hitchhiking, as traffic just swirled pass them...and so did my mom and i....i was so bitter....at me....i cant believe i just let those amazing people go by...so while my mom ran in walmart, i new i had to have some prayer time...and of course i pulled out pen and the only paper i had, as anyone who knows me knows i have to write down how i feel to sort myself....by this point i was so discouraged that i wouldnt find any good subjects... i had the new shawn mcdonald cd in for background music and the words to the chorus of this one song just happened to be playing and as soon as i heard the lyrics, i knew God had put them there at that very moment after i had prayed for strength...the chorus simply said "Take hold, dont give up, gotta give it our best shot, take hold"...How great is our God...    

        amidst my writing, i had a revelation...all morning i had been struggling with what to say when i approach people with hopes of taking their picture...as i was writing all the people i missed, i wrote "i cant let another story get away." and it hit me...thats what they are, these photographs...stories...and i knew that if they asked why i wanted to take their picture, i would say "Because i want to tell your story." And at that moment I made a vow to myself that that would be my ultimate goal as a photographer from this day out...to tell a story with a single photograph...whether I just happen to one day be a mom who loves taking pictures of her children, or a professional photojournalist....my photographs will tell a story....my passion for photography has been ignited like no other lately....what is God doing in me? The coast was unbelievable...slabs were all that remained....a single set of steps that led to nothing...a cross someone had built amongst the rubble...it was devastating...but you know what? there was beauty amongst the devastation....i walked down to the shoreline to take a picture of a tree that had blown across the street and just saw water for miles...overwhelming how small we are in this world....as weird as this is, today, i recognized how beautiful that area actually was, now that everything is gone and nature remains....even the trees look ghostly without leaves and bark...but beautiful...churches with all their walls blown out stood, but you could see chairs inside as an indication they still met there...faith...its beautiful...faith that the same God with the strength to blow wind into being can calm the storm...just my thoughts...